Dating a bi guy about dating and relationships
So tell her, and if she reacts badly, better to know sooner rather than later. We had the following conversation: Ultimately he said “I would never consider dating someone seriously that I felt would not be okay with my sexuality.
Second of all, this issue is important because one might wonder why you have only dated men.
My biggest worry is that you have only dated men because you are more attracted to men, and that now you only want to date a woman for convenience/societal acceptance reasons.
To be honest, I completely forgot about it, and for a long time, was not even sure what month we met in. I figured out our anniversary when something unrelated reminded me that it might be coming up.
See, last week was the anniversary of a short residential program I participated in, where I got to leave the country and study foreign direct investment in developing nations.
I've loved women deeply and to suggest that me seeing a woman on the side when I'm with a man "doesn't count" is to completely devalue and dismiss that love. A lot of lesbians are terrified of dating bi girls in case they "run off" with a man. Contrary to popular belief, we don't fancy the entire population, any more than straight girls fancy every single bloke. It's kinda cute when you still do a little double-take. Bisexuality is not a comfy little alcove for people to rest in while they gather courage to come out as gay, or just a way to impress guys at parties.10. People don't question a frantically masturbating virgin teenage boy when he says he likes those girls on the internet, so why question adult "virgin" bisexuals? "Oh, so you might as well say you're straight, then? Tending towards one gender in general doesn't in any way dilute our attraction to anyone else we like or have liked.12.
And if you do find a bi girl who isn't into exclusive relationships, it's still a really shit chat-up line and will immediately lessen your chances of most women continuing the conversation, let alone open any doors to hot group-sex action. If only you could see our faces when we open the fifth threesome message of the day… Equally, they're no more likely to jump at your suggestion of having an open relationship or to giggle and comply when you tell them to snog their mate in a club for a laugh. Being bi usually means having the capacity to both love and feel sexual desire for more than one gender. Yup, we can live quite happily without male penetration. We can share those painful youthful memories of cringey bra-hook moments (seriously, it still takes practice, even if you know how to do it on yourself). You wouldn't keep asking a straight girl if she was "sure" she was straight, so don't keep asking us to reassess our sexuality. Having a preference for one gender still means we're bi.
The bi community is full of genderfluid, trans and other gender-non-conforming individuals, as well as solid friends and allies of those people. Date a bi girl and you might find yourself learning a lot more about gender beyond the binary world of "he" and "she". We'll love you even more if you come and march with us.
I can't even begin to count the number of times I've dropped the "b-bomb" and the girl I've been talking to has suddenly needed the toilet and then a few minutes later been seen chatting someone else up on the other side of the room. Woody Allen has a lot to answer for with his "doubles your chances on a Saturday night" comment. Not every bisexual has had sexual contact with more than one gender. Perhaps they've felt shy, or picky, or the opportunity has simply never arisen. We're often open-minded about gender in other ways. Unsurprisingly, given how far society still has to go, a lot of us are quite into our activism and the fight for bi visibility.
The point is, that I remembered I met Jay right after returning from that trip, so our one year anniversary must be coming up too.